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Every once in a while, I go through a mind-cleansing process. I do this to clear my mind, achieve better focus, and find internal and external balance. One of my exercises is self-reflection. It helps me assess my thinking, de-clutter, and get rid of thinking patterns that prevent me from evolving to the next level. I look in the mirror and I ask myself, “What do you see?” The question doesn’t relate to my physical appearance. It is a deeper soul search intended to unearth deeply entrenched patterns of negative belief.

We’ grow up in societies shaped by belief systems—religious, political, cultural, ones related to gender identity, etc. We create layers of belief that overlap and shape the way we perceive and find meaning in the world around us. Our beliefs govern our thoughts. If we are not conscious and do not self-evaluate and our consistent participation in certain negative thoughts, we will form a strong pattern that may be difficult to break.

In my personal reflection exercise, I thought about my reluctance to position myself in spaces where I might attract attention. I know I offer value, not just in my writing. I also connect people with resources and people so they can flourish and achieve their projects or goals. My natural inclination is to teach through writing rather than sitting in front of a camera. My rationale is that I can specify, add, delete, verify, and re-verify what I mean to make sure my message fully expresses my intent. I don't necessarily want this to be about me. I want my message to get attention so it can teach and reach a wider audience and encourage people to self-assess, self-reflect, and be self-aware about how they can grow to become the best version of themselves.

Thus, for a long time, my avoidance of the limelight made me wonder why I do it and led me dig more deeply into the psychology behind my decision. The journey to self-mastery is a process that requires you to dig deeper and expose everything that feels uncomfortable. It makes you highly vulnerable but is liberating at the same time. Self-reflection is an act of love best done in love in place of self- judgment.

Writing is a happy place for me, and I would never change that. In my recent moment of reflection, I had a an “aha” moment. I listened and relied on my intuition to guide me. Now I feel that my view on whether I want attention or not has changed. My gifts and talents are an extension of myself and getting noticed for it is a good thing. I am okay with that. Therefore, it is now my responsibility to decide how to respond to attention. I am accountable for the way I present myself in this space. When you bring a positive energy, the attention you receive bounces back on this energy. If you push negativity, the attention can only reflect this. You must define your intention in all that you do.

So, trying to extract myself from the equation and wanting people to concentrate on writing creates conflict in both intent and outcome. Everything should be synchronized in perfect harmony to create the desired result and success. This whole process really was a master class this month. Self-mastery is a path to growth.

Self-mastery allows to build the self-confidence, courage, and clarity that ultimately leads to better experiences in all aspects of life.

Use these strategies to gain mastery:

Connect with yourself every day. We spend so much time connecting with everyone else. We invest our time and money in making the external function better, and neglect what helps us build the structure of our internal existence so we can function better and live a much more wholesome life.

Intuitive. Declutter and separate yourself from things that make it difficult for you to listen, connect, and hear your heart.

Stay engaged in self-development. Growth is not a race; it is done gradually. You must remain committed to the process and do whatever is necessary every day.

Be clear about who you are. Don’t spend time going around in circles. Find out where you are in your growth and where you would like to be. So, if you lack integrity and you want to grow in this area of your life, be clear about that and put the right structure in place to help you evolve into that person. Regardless of what you know, you will find yourself in situations where you will be challenged to grow up.

Don’t work against yourself. Disrupt all your negative assumptions. Allow love to be the foundation of all you do.

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